Weeknotes #10: w/e 2nd October

At the end of May I hit a wall and stopped writing weeknotes, or anything besides things required by job or life (including communicating with my friends and family.) Relentless lockdown, confronting systemic racism and a multitude of mini crises just became too much for me. I’ve been in a permanent state of survival mode since I upended my life in the UK to move to Ottawa, change jobs and have a second baby, but the spring of 2020 felt like turbocharged survival mode: Here, deal with all those things you already find totally overwhelming, plus take away every bit of support you had in the form of childcare and community, add some extra responsibilities and the crushing sadness of the world. No complaining because at least you have your health!!!

Now I’m just over two weeks into daycare and school both being back and I’m starting to feel like I can breathe again. Everything still feels very uncertain and temporary, so I’m making an effort to be present and take what I need while I have the chance.

A few highlights from recent days:

• I recently started on a product team that has been going for a while, and I’ve spent most of my time so far trying to make sense what was done previously. This week I’ve started really taking ownership of it by reorganizing, reclassifying and restructuring things based on how I think they can have the most impact. It’s nothing groundbreaking but it’s important and hopefully will set us up for success going forward.
• I facilitated discussions on a difficult topics, and I think the openness was energizing to all (at least they were to me.)
• I started sketching and taking handwritten notes again. I haven’t done this since I left GDS in 2019 and it really helps with my concentration, focus and creativity.
• I finally set up a desk. I’ve been working from home a few days a week for years, but I’ve always kept it flexible — going from kitchen table to couch to floor and outside if possible. My new desk is temporary — It’s in the baby’s room so not available at night or during naps when he’s home — but it’s a start and it’s made my work like feel more grounded and structured, which has helped me focus.
• I’ve finally been able to start thinking more broadly about things other than the immediate tasks I need to do — things like, participating in discussions, setting long-term goals, reading and watching interesting things, signing up for courses and conferences. And I don’t even have to listen with one ear.

That’s about all I can articulate today — thanks for reading.